DCEU Films: Worst to Best

There have been four films leading up to Justice League, and they've caused quite a stir from fans and critics alike. I'll let you know now so you can opt out of this early. I'm not much of a fan of these films as a whole.

4. 'Suicide Squad'

I mean, what the fuck even is this? Most of the character design in this film is solid. Harley Quinn isn't the worst. She's not written well, but Margot Robbie acts her wonderfully. Viola Davis' acting is also on point as you would expect, even though the character's plot is mostly nonsense. Plus, I don't even mind Jared Leto's Joker; I quite enjoyed his take on it. Then literally everything else is garbage, and I'm sorry if you're a hardcore DC fan or even a Will Smith fan but no. Just no. The story is absurd, the editing is abysmal, the acting all around isn't too bad (bar a couple of noticeably bad performances), but no one has anything to do for most of the film. I don't need multiple long ass introductions to the characters, and to be honest, just scrap it and start over.

3. 'Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice'

Look, visually this film is very interesting. Until that big grey blob shows up and it all looks like nothing. Ben Affleck as Batman: Stellar. Henry Cavill as Superman: Strong. Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman: Solid. Jessie Eisenberg as Lex Luthor: Happened. Also, what is anyone doing in this film? So much happens, yet nothing at all happens. It's a series of cool looking shots that fall down the stairs of the plot technically hitting each mark along the tumble. If your main characters are motherfucking Batman and Superman, and the resolve is Batman hears your mama has the same name as his mama, you've fucked up. The main fight between them is pretty good though. Yup, that's all I really have to say without an in-depth review. This film exists. Are you happy now?

2. 'Man Of Steel'

Off the bat let me apologise for just generally not liking Superman. This film ranks at 2nd in the DCEU because it's one of two films that has a fairly consistent plot and isn't mostly garbage. However, it's mostly boring and more like that thing on your desk you look at thinking: 'I should probably bin that.' But for some reason you never seem to get round to it. As a film this is technically much better than the previous two on this list. As entertainment it's a drag but it's a watchable visually understandable drag unlike the anger inducing nonsense of the others. A bit like Hulk or Thor, they make enough sense but they sure as hell aren't interesting. I can feel the DC/Superman fans attacking me already. I'm sorry my opinion doesn't aline with yours and I'm sorry most of these films aren't any good. I wanted them to be amazing just as much as you. But look, what's that on the horizon?

1. 'Wonder Woman'

Oh, thank fuck for this film. She's a woman. Yes, that's what I'm opening with because it's fucking important. This film finally gave us the female superhero movie we needed and deserved. Everyone's acting is amazing throughout. Visually this film is a blast bar, yet again, a big grey dude villain in like some red smoke or whatever... The music, the acting, the set pieces, the romance, the comedy, the action. Its all good. Wonder Woman is such a culturally important film and a good superhero movie that I'm willingly to totally ignore a gaping in hole in the plot and just let it be what it is, a solid film that made progress for women. Yes, keep it, it's good. Let's hope they don't fuck her or the Themyscirans up in Justice League... Oh, for fuck sake.

What can we expect from Justice League?

If I had to guess, I'd say it's probably going to come in at 2nd, and even if it's pretty bad, 3rd. There's not a whole lot to compete with, and it has Cyborg, Flash, and Aquaman. I'm hopeful and will get back to you with a review in a few days!