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7 of My Favorite Worst Movie Quotes from Popular Films

What are the worst movie dialogue lines in modern cinema? Try these! Lines so bad, no actor could possibly salvage them...

By Matt CatesPublished 7 years ago 11 min read
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Batman V Superman

We expect terrible dialogue in terrible movies, but sometimes we get caught off guard by really bad lines in otherwise good--or even great--flicks. And then there are times when the lines are bad and the film isn't that great, but it is still a blockbuster (Hi, Transformers franchise!). So rather than try to sift through "good" movies and "bad but popular" movies, can I get away with just "The Worst Movie Quotes from Popular Films?"

That way I get to include my favorite classic cheese from some arguably bad movies that I nonetheless liked (more or less), as did millions of other fans. Films such as the Star Wars prequels (from which, admittedly, I am still recovering...).

And by the way, don't be surprised that this article doesn't contain stupid movie quotes from drama or romance flicks. Those movies don't interest me, nor should they you! Well, I shouldn't say that. It's a free country. Watch what you like.

But just understand, these horrific movie quotes only come from films I have an affinity for, and if you guys don't know my writing style by now, I cannot help you! As a Scorpio, I'm required by cosmic code to be opinionated.

"Noooo!!" (Darth Vader, from Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith)

Darth Vader from Star Wars Revenge of the Sith

SPOILER ALERT!

When Emperor Palpatine's medical droids were done turning Anakin Skywalker into the full-on cyborg version of Darth Vader in Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith, Vader's first concern was for his pregnant wife, Padme...whom he'd force choked hours earlier.

Palpatine lies to Vader, telling him that he'd killed her, so Vader's response was to bust out of his thick chrome restraints and stand melodramatically and, in iconic classic monster style, yell up to the Heavens, "Nooooo!!!"

The problem is, it just doesn't ring true at all. It is a beautifully set scene, very stark and noir. And the film did need some kind of climactic emotional outburst from Vader, to show his final vestiges of humanity. But...I don't know; it didn't work and became instead one of the images that people spend the next 20 years mocking and making memes out of.

Empire Strikes Back did it right, with Luke Skywalker's "Noooo!!" But Vader's "Noooo!!" fell as flat as a Mynock's face pressed against your windshield. Sorry, George! Otherwise, it was a good movie, the best of the prequels!

Speaking of Star Wars, here's Star Wars 'Things I Have a Bad Feeling About.'

Clone Wars rage across the galaxy. The sinister Sith Lord seizes control of the Republic and corrupts Anakin Skywalker to be his dark apprentice, Darth Vader. Obi-Wan Kenobi must confront his fallen friend in an epic lightsaber duel.

"Royal with Cheese..." (Vincent from Pulp Fiction)

Vincent and Jules from Pulp Fiction

Okay, hear me out. I love Quentin Tarantino dialogue, even though it is extremely over the top at times. The point is that it's FUN! But he does stretch it sometimes. Pulp Fiction, you know the scene, the two assassins Vincent Vega and Jules riding in the car on the way to a hit, and Vincent is talking about his recent trip to Paris.

Vincent: And you know what they call a... a... a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris?Jules: They don't call it a Quarter Pounder with cheese?Vincent: No man, they got the metric system. They wouldn't know what the fuck a Quarter Pounder is.Jules: Then what do they call it?Vincent: They call it a Royale with cheese.

"...a Royale with cheese."

Do I doubt they call it a Royale with Cheese? No, they probably do. Hell, I don't know; I've been to Paris but not to visit no stinkin' McDonald's!

But what does the name of the burger have to do with the metric system?

Vincent's argument is, no one uses pounds as a unit of measurement in Europe, so "quarter pound" wouldn't mean anything as far as descriptions go. But what, then, does "royale" tell the customer? Nothing! It is equally meaningless, in my opinion.

Perhaps Tarantino actually did the research into the reasons behind the naming system of the Parisian McDonald's. Perhaps he was just winging it. But either way, I think the line crumbles on examination. The only question is, who do we blame? If I must blame the country of France as a whole, I'm prepared to do that.

For all of their murdering, Vincent and Jules are pretty likable guys. Here's a look into The Terrifying Optimism of Villains: Surprising life lessons from fiction's worst scum bags!

Writer/director Quentin Tarantino delivers an unforgettable cast of characters -- including a pair of low-rent hit men, their boss's sexy wife, and a desperate prizefighter -- in a wildly entertaining and exhilarating motion picture adventure that both thrills and amuses!

"I'm Terribly Vexed." (Commodus from Gladiator)

Commodus from Gladiator

When the dashing but insecure Roman Emperor Commodus asks his wily sister Lucilla why his nemesis, former commander turned slave-gladiator Maximus Decimus Meridius is still alive, she replies, "I don't know."

Commodus, sitting at his desk signing papers without looking at her (or them), states simply, "He shouldn't be alive. It vexes me. I'm terribly vexed."

The line is delivered quite dispassionately, which is suitable for the cold-hearted character. But it's boring and has gone done in infamy as one of the worst lines of dialogue in modern cinema. I think that might be overstating it, but nonetheless, the line does appear again and again in such lists as this one... And who am I to question the bandwagon? I'm going to catch enough flak with the Pulp Fiction line up above!

When a Roman general is betrayed and his family murdered by a corrupt prince, he comes to Rome as a gladiator to seek revenge.

"I Never Narc'd on Nobody!" (Dom from The Fast and the Furious)

Tran and Dom from The Fast and the Furious

Somehow Dominic Toretto became a cult legend starring in 8 successful Fast & Furious films.

I've got nothing against the character. But when Johnny Tran calls our boy out over a recent SWAT invasion of his home, Dom let's it be known in no uncertain terms that he "never narc'd on nobody!"

It's a powerful, alliterated line, delivered with the film franchise's trademark zest for outrageously over-testosteroned acting.

It's also dumb, but hey... Most likely it is more authentic "street talk" than what I'd be able to come up with! I guess I won't be penning the next Fast & Furious script. Or the one after that...

P.S. My thanks for Reddit users for giving me this one!

Fans of this era of flicks might want to read 90’s Hero Movies Well Worth Another Watch.

On the turbo-charged streets of Los Angeles, every night is a championship race. With intense full-throttle action, awesome high-speed stunts, and full-on pedal to the metal intensity, this fast and furious assault puts you in the driver's seat and dares you to exceed all limits.

"Save Martha!" (Superman from Batman V Superman)

Batman V Superman

As my faithful readers will know (if I have any), I recently mentioned this duel of titans in my OMNI article Greatest Science Fiction One-on-One Battles Ever...and Their Spoofs!So it's not that I don't like Batman V Superman; I just don't have a lot of respect for it, in part due to the dialogue. In large part.

I'm not alone in this, so there's no need for lengthy explanation. If you've watched the film, you know. If you haven't--SPOILER ALERT!--basically Batman has decided to kill Superman on the flimsy basis that Superman may one day become evil like General Zod and thus he should be dealt with now versus later. I felt this went 100% against the grain of what the Batman character has ever stood for, and a lot of fans agreed. But I digress; it happened, so let's move on.

Batman has his armored foot on Superman's chest, a Kryptonite spear in hand, ready to plunge into Big Blue's heart. First, of course, Batman uses the tip to cruelly scratch a scar into Superman's cheek--again, not very in character, in my opinion--but in the last moment Superman utters something to the effect of:

Superman: "You're letting him kill Martha."Batman: What does that mean? Why did you say that name?"Superman: "Find. Him. Save. Martha!"

Yes, so as has been recounted on numerous fanboy sites and elsewhere, the flimsy reason Batman decides to NOT kill Superman is even flimsier than the reason he wanted to do it in the first place.

Both of them have mothers named Martha. Somehow...somehow the Dark Knight Detective, through all of his research into Superman, never knew this little factoid.

Can't get enough of the Batman? Me, too! So try Top Ten Classic Comic Batman Trivia Tidbits! Murderous intentions, red convertibles, gay myths, and criminal clowns... let's learn about the early days of the Dark Knight!

From director Zack Snyder comes “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice,” starring Ben Affleck as Batman and Henry Cavill as Superman in the characters’ first big-screen pairing.

"Bullets into Steam..." (The Comedian from Watchmen)

Watchmen

I love the Watchmen, both the Alan Moore DC comics/graphic novel and the Zack Snyder movie. But one line has always vexed me terribly:

"You could've turned the gun into steam, the bullets into mercury, the bottle into goddamned snowflakes but you didn't, did you?"

This to Doctor Manhattenafter The Comedian has just gunned down his pregnant Vietnamese girlfriend in cold blood.

Uh, guys? We could've done better. I appreciate the poetry of it all, I suppose, and I respect Snyder's decision to stay loyal to the corny dialogue from the comic. But on a scale from 1 to 100 in terms of credibility, this line gets about a 2. Who would say something like this after shooting a pregnant Vietnamese woman in a bar? I don't care what the other circumstances are. The line is terrible. Moore could've turned this line into something decent, the words into plausible dialogue, the sentences into something believable, but he didn't, did he?

No. Sorry. Not this time. But the rest is freakin' fantastic! The only question is, Which Watchman Was Worst?

Watch the most celebrated graphic novel of all time come to life in this suspenseful action packed film. Rorschach discovers a disturbing conspiracy with terrible consequences for the future.

"You'd Have Invented Facebook." (Zuckerberg from The Social Network)

The Social Network

Is this line so clever that I don't get it, or is it just dumb? It can be hard to tell when we're dealing withJesse Eisenbergplaying Mark Zuckerberg in The Social Network...essentially a pretty smart actor playing a pretty genius billionaire. So don't let me make the call; I can't handle the responsibility, thus I offer it up to you to decide...

Here's the line:

"If you guys were the inventors of Facebook, you'd have invented Facebook."

I guess maybe the real question is, did the Zuck actually say this, or was it some output from an overpaid screenwriter who was trying to outwit us all but failed, and then it somehow survived the many edits and rewrites and even perhaps the raised eyebrows of the actors themselves as they sat around reading this thing in rehearsal?

Or...was it head nods all around, because the director liked it and no one wanted to question their authority, that sort of herd mentality that was likely present during the shooting of not only this line but all of the lines referenced here in this article.

Who knows?

And at this point, as I conclude my piece on the Worst Movie Quotes from Popular Films, and I review my sentences for their SEO readability and worry what sort of reading score I might end up with, it occurs to me that if I'd have done better research into this piece, I'd have done better research.

Hey, this circular logic is pretty good; I think I'll start working into my daily conversation to see what happens.

A story about the founders of the social-networking website, Facebook.

6 of the Best "Worst" Science Fiction Movies You'll Ever See

Battlefield Earth

Enabling Your Guilty Pleasure Love of Awful Sci-Fi Films...Because We Care

It's a passion we share, you and I. Low quality science fiction films, movies so bad that they're fun to watch, mock, and over time, come to love intensely. It's the reason you're here.

I know. I know...

So here are OMNI's picks for the best worst science fiction movies to be found, floating out there online like undigested bits of gum in the sewer. They're still full of flavor, if you're brave or dumb enough to give 'em a taste...

And I know you are...because it's the reason you are here, with me.

With us...

Keep reading...

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Keep reading...

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An Artificially Intelligent virus is stalking you... Your stepfather keeps trying (sometimes successfully) to kill you!

Your DNA is being rewritten by nanobots!! And your grandfather Paris? Yeah. He's probably the spy behind it all.

WELCOME TO THE CONSPIRATORIAL WORLD OF HECTOR HAVECK.

Like most young heroes he was born from catastrophe...

All California teen Hector Haveck wanted for the summer was to get closer to his attractive Robotics classmate, Yésica Brick. Instead he's forced to figure out his seven new lame superpowers. Each one only works for one day a week...

·Sundays: Glowing in the dark (Wow).·Mondays: Bending spoons with his mind (Big deal).·Tuesdays: Growing eyes anywhere on his body (Gross!).·Wednesdays: Cooking objects with the heat of his mouth (Pointless...).·Thursdays: Seeing the family tree and history of any person he meets (Kinda cool?).·Fridays: Instant healing after two minutes (Now we're talkin'!).·Saturdays: Manipulation of dreams and reality(Uh, that's weird. And spooky...).

...and these 'useless' abilities quickly become dangerous and out of Heck's control. He soon learns that a side effect of his last two abilities is the power to cross dimensions...which is exactly what he was built to do by 'The Fin,' a secret society obsessed with locating Oannes ReHav-Marre,the immortal king of ancient Atlantis. The problem is Oannes and his mermen legions will do anything to return home, even if it means erasing 10,000 years of human history!

With an intertwining story arc of Nikola Tesla, Godfather of the Electrical Age, and extended cameos by Rasputin the Mad Monk (personal healer to the last Tsar of Russia), Napoleon of France, Jack the Ripper, Adolf Hitler, Albert Einstein, and many others, this original, genre-bending tale tackles every global conspiracy conceivable--from Men in Black, the JFK assassination, the lost city of Atlantis, CIA and KGB mind control programs,trans-dimensional 'aliens,' and secret elitist cabals plotting world domination from Bohemian Grove, 'Haveck' finally sheds light on the puppeteers behind it ALL!

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About the Creator

Matt Cates

Freelance writer and owner of Cates Content and Copywriting; retired Air Force Veteran; former administrative assistant at Oregon State University; author of Haveck: The First Transhuman, the greatest sci-fi novel in the multiverse.

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