'Avengers: Endgame' Review

Enjoy my outlined review of Avengers: Endgame (2019).

• I liked the opening scene. It felt appropriate since we haven’t seen Hawkeye in a while. We knew his family would disappear. That being said, I was still confused as to why he decided to go and kill a bunch o’ people for no reason.
• I understand Captain Marvel has been busy protecting the universe but her time in the movie seemed short-lived. Granted, we just saw the movie but her story was technically told in the 90s. The dream of the 90s in NOT alive in 2019. Despite what the chunky sneaker come-back may be telling us.
• The gang finding Thanos and then Thor straight up decapitating him seemed very fast and confusing. Like that’s it? I honestly was not expecting 5 years to pass.
• All I can say is thank god for that fucking rat and for Ant Man. I had no idea just how important this character would be in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Would he have vanished if he weren’t in the quantum realm?
• I’m still confused about all the time travel and how it works. There seem to be many contradictions and crossovers when it comes to their past selves and creating new realities. Did Loki survive?? That’s really all I want to know at this point.
• Going back to the beginning when we all thought Tony was going to die in space, but was rescued and brought back home. That scene between him and Steve was so juicy and dramatic. It gave me everything. I’m still not sorry for choosing Team Iron Man in Captain America: Civil War (2016).
• I was so happy Tony finally got to be a dad. This was the one spoiler I had going in to the movie (thanks, Tumblr) but as far as spoilers go, this wasn’t the worst.
• The comments on Captain America’s ass. Okay yeah, he’s got a great ass and I suppose we need some sort of comic relief but it almost seemed excessive? Coming from Paul Rudd, though, it seemed somewhat appropriate.
• I was so excited to see them all revisit different parts of the movies. New York 2012. Even if we didn’t see Loki come back, we got to see him again here which was almost enough for me. Is he alive?!?! Tony giving his past self a heart attack and Cap using “Hail Hydra” in the elevator was freaking genius.
• Absolutely LIVED for Tony & Steve going back to New Jersey in 1970. So happy Tony got to talk to his dad and tell him goodbye. And I guess the part with Steve creeping on Peggy was also kind of sweet?
• Why did they have to make Thor fat? Many arguments can be made for this. I get it, he’s been through a lot, but maybe don’t poke so much fun at him strictly for being fat if that’s the case. He’s still the god of thunder and can kick so much ass. The fact that everyone doubted him all of a sudden because he had a gut was so stupid. But Korg and the Noobmaster69 part was pretty great.
• While I don’t 100 percent support Fat Thor™ I liked the heart to heart he had with his mom when he went back to Asgard in 2013. Not very much of Jane—which I still don’t really know how to feel about, but whatever.
• That being said, all the minor characters deserved a little more. I realize there are so many at this point but was Scott Lang at all concerned about whether or not his daughter Cassie had her mom and stepdad around? We don’t even know what happened to them. And Luis? What about Luis??
• Bruce in New York talking to the Ancient One was an exciting moment. While I didn’t so much care for Doctor Strange (2016), I always like seeing Tilda Swinton do her thang.
• Nebula & Rhodey going to Morag in 2014 and knocking Quill out during his whole opening dance scene from Guardians of the Galaxy (2014) was iconic. So easy and hilarious.
• Clint & Natasha travel to Vormir to retrieve the soul stone and encounter Red Skull. Nat sacrifices herself which was a tragedy in itself but their fight to sacrifice themselves instead of the other was the most painful. We knew Clint wasn’t going to die because of his family and this seemed like the noblest way for Black Widow to go but still fucking suuuuucks. But how incredible would it have been to see Steve and Red Skull together on screen again???
• Also Banner & the Hulk merged into one was a little weird. And to be honest, he was not well utilized during the entire film. Needed more Hulk for sure.
• I’ve grown to like Nebula of course but god damn, if she wasn’t there then their plan would’ve worked seamlessly. I realize you need conflict to move the story forward and this was absolutely perfect but it doesn’t change how pissed off I was in the theater watching this unfold.
• But seriously, if Clint & Nat went back in time to retrieve the soul stone, then wouldn’t Gamora still be alive and Thanos wouldn’t have gotten it? It would’ve changed their reality. Now 2014 Gamora has to get to know Quill all over again. It’s as if the Guardians of the Galaxy movies were all for naught.
• At the end with the big battle scene, I was so relieved when Sam told Cap “on your left” and everyone appeared. I was getting worried that this was the end for Captain America but there everyone was. An army. And the moment Tony saw Peter again was so great. “Oh this is nice.”
• I loved the all female hero parts, but again with Captain Marvel showing up at the end? Like come on, bitch. Commit. No matter how many other things are going on in the universe, this is the fight of all fights.
• I’m not really sure what I expected for the gauntlet. Hulk was going to do it. Captain Marvel was going to do it? Thor? It all came down to Tony which I was kind of confused about but I guess it was part of the plan (diversion?). Then again, it’s always been riding on his shoulders. It’s always been his fight it seems like and what an honor to go out in the blaze of glory.
• Tony’s death gutted me. He’s been my favorite since the beginning obviously and wanted him to have a life with Pepper and his daughter. But he won. He saved everyone. Peter returned. His last words to him were just as sad as when Tony held Peter as he disappeared. Pepper saying “you can rest now” wrecked me. I’ll never be the same.
• Just seeing everyone at the funeral AND the “proof that Tony Stark has a heart” arc reactor got me so emotional! I was confused on who the one kid standing by himself was but then realized he was the kid from Iron Man 3 (2013) and just died a little more inside.
• I was happy Thor decided to crown Valkyrie as king of Asgard and Cap finally got his dance with his girl. “Sure, I’ll return the stones AND stay and live my goddamn life with Peggy.” Which brings up some other questions like kissing his great niece, Sharon, in Civil War?? I don’t know what happens with the timeline and at this point I’m too afraid to ask.
• Cap giving his shield to Sam was a great move and I’m excited to see where they go with his character. But damn, Steve leaving Bucky behind was kind of sad. #buddiesfahlyfe

All in all, a great film. I may decide to revisit this when/if I choose to go see it again. I am in no way a movie critic and kind of hate movie critics but hey, I have a lot of opinions when it comes to the Marvel films. Fight me in the comments.