Hey Cable TV, Stop Cutting the Credit Roll and Final Score!

I'm not one of these movie aficionados who must sit alone in the dark so I can see who the third best boy was in a production. But it drives me nuts when the cable company micro-boxes the credits and cuts off the ending score. Of course, it’s not necessary to play the entirety of the scroll. Raiders of the Lost Ark, for one, descends into a romantic drone after the iconic uplift. So feel free to cut away after about a minute.

There are also plenty of other films that don’t really need your mother’s sauce to top off the macaroni and meatballs. Star Wars actually falls into this category. The ending ceremony with the heroic triumvirate is kind of lame, and the score skips over the iconic trumpeting that kicks off the franchise. On the other hand, the quick cut on Raiders off the Lost Ark is nearly a crime against humanity and leads my list (despite what comes after 68 seconds).

Raiders of the Lost Ark

After all the action and intrigue, Raiders ends on a dour note. Even though we know that a look inside is not wisely in the cards, the stowing away of the Ark of the Covenant hurts. So as the artifact fades again into archeological obscurity and the accompanying musical notes sour us even further, John Williams score rushes in to rescue and trumpet our spirits.

Otherwise, when the cable cut intervenes, we never get the uplift intended. We don't get to distance ourselves from the disappointment that Indy feels and are left dangling despite all that was accomplished. But the cable company gets 30 more seconds to secure its monopoly and add even more money to their bloated bottom line... So thank you for that.

Planes, Trains and Automobiles

Planes, Trains and Automobiles is touchingly amusing - the touchingly mostly arriving at the end. The final look on John Candy’s face exudes a hope that we all have probably felt and cry out for a return if we seek to regain a loss of our own. It would have been nice if John Hughes gave us a longer look. Or maybe not but cutting away as the screen goes black is not ok.

We need to hear more, so we can replace John Candy’s image with the emptiness of our pain and then revel in the possibilities. 30 years later, though, the chop is even worse. We need the darkness to reckon the drastically premature loss of John Candy. But the present also demands we celebrate that we will always have him, and that he will never really will go away.

Tootsie

You might not currently be passing time watching trains go by, but at some point, you were. Michael Dorsey certainly was in Tootsie, and when he tried to catch one in Jessica Lange, he got hit by a freight. His journey was no less arduous, and when he finally disembarks, his high heels are worn down to the bone.

As for us, we need a respite too, and It Might be You gives us the chance to reflect. Either we remember our own journey or anticipate what hopefully lays ahead. And once upon a time in 1982, we probably sat there in the theater until the last note played and the screen went blank. So anything less is an affront to all that makes us human. On the other hand, that ad telling us to watch the next Avengers movie is pretty important too.

Star Trek : First Contact

The best of all the Star Trek movies, the very end of First Contact is a bit anti-climatic. Zephram Cochrane clumsily giving a little musical appreciation lesson to his Vulcan guests tapers us off. But then the music begins and gets us ready for the stars. Minus the theremin, the original score by Alexander Courage encompasses and brings us back.

The bold beat not only reminds of the original triumph of boldly going, but the diaspora we overcame during 10 long years of reruns. The sentiment is almost defiant, and the seamless transition into the Next Generation score demands its say too. Not only were we right the first time they cancelled Star Trek but the success of the Next Generation signaled that we’re going to keep this thing running forever. So leave it alone optimum, we’ve earned this.

Who's got more credit/score cuts that annoy?

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Rich Monetti can be reached at [email protected]