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My Top 4 "Say No to Drugs" Cartoon Show Episodes

I don't know if these episodes did their job, but it was interesting to see them try.

By D.K. UpshawPublished 5 years ago 4 min read
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The "War on Drugs" was such a big thing in the 1980s, as it should have been. Warning young kids against the evils of illegal substances and the people who sell them was and is important. Kidvid, in the 80s, was a huge part of this, as just about every kids' show, animated or live action, had a "just say no" episode. Here I give you my personal favorites from the era. The criteria: It has to be a show's regular episode—no specials. Here it goes.

"The Case of the Lowest Crime"—C.O.P.S.

An ashen-faced pusher named Addictum dispenses "crystal twist"—a gemlike substance absorbed through the skin and causing a colossal crime wave that keeps our heroes, the C.O.P.S., busy rounding up addicts and unable to track the pusher down. Addictum tries to strike a distribution deal with the show's main villain, the Big Boss, but even he has his limits, "I've committed many crimes in my life... but drugs are where I draw the line—drugs KILL!" Later that night, Big Boss's crooks are at the docks out to steal art treasures, but Beserko, the stupid punk, falls into Addictum's crate full of crystal twist, suffering a near-fatal overdose. At the hospital, we learn Big Boss loves his dumb old nephew after all, and vows to get twist off the streets, "even if it means helping the C.O.P.S.!" So good guys and bad guys team up and corner Addictum in the hospital, where he's confronted by an angry Beserko, he overcomes his overdose and wants to "thank" the pusher for hospitalizing him. Addictum surrenders quickly, and C.O.P.S. and crooks go back to opposite sides of the law.

"Alone Again"—JEM

Laura Holloway is a recently orphaned girl temporarily staying at Starlight Manision. She is welcomed with open arms by all, especially when they hear her sing, but her loss keeps her from getting close to anyone. At school, a boy named Bobby offers to help her get over her shyness with a few uppers—"courage in a capsule"—which cause her to think she's a bird and tries to fly out a window! Jerrica catches her in time, but the more uppers Laura takes, the more disturbed she becomes, her actions get her punished by Jerrica and alienated by the other Starlight Girls. Then comes the day when Bobby demands money for more drugs. Laura is caught stealing from Jerrica's purse, and the girl has a heart-to-heart with the foster mom, after which she admits her addiction to a narcotics anonymous-style group for girls, and later helps the police arrest Bobby. The episode ends with Laura singing with Jem and Holograms, performing the song she wrote, "Look Inside Yourself."

"Mind Pollution"—CAPTAIN PLANET AND THE PLANETEERS

Ratlike eco-villain,Verminous Skumm turned drug pusher, is selling a capsule called "bliss"—which looks a heck of a lot like prozac—to less-than-confident-feeling teens in Washington, D.C wanting that "instant courage." And one of those kids is Planeteer, Linka's cousin Boris, who just moved to the US, and whom Linka is visiting. Skumm tricks Boris into serving Linka bliss-laced blintzes, so that when the other Planeteers go to pick her up, she is a full-blown addict so "blissed out" that she cannot operate her Planeteer ring when the city's bliss heads begin chasing them all over DC. At one point, Boris goes through a window, cutting his arms so badly they bleed onscreen; Gi binds his wounds. It all comes to a head when Skumm gives Boris a whole bottle of bliss, he downs it—and dies of an overdose, right in front of Linka, and only then can she summon the strength to help summon Captain Planet. Cap shows remarkable restraint, and merely tosses Skumm and his drugs out of DC, saying, "According to my house rules, DEALER ALWAYS LOSES!" The next day, Linka and all the other blissheads are treated, but she says she'll never really be all right after losing Boris...

"The Price"—BRAVESTARR

This, for me, is the toughest "say no to drugs" episode I've ever seen, even tougher than "Mind Pollution." A Dingo, one of the evil races on the planet of New Texas, approaches a group of kids and dares them to try a drug called "spin"—that is, if they're not chicken! One boy, Jay, "proves" he's not by taking a hit and enjoying it. Then he forces his friends not to be snitches. This Dingo really gets around, because there are so many "spinheads" in Fort Kerium for Bravestarr and his deputies to round up, they've no time to look for the pusher. Eventually, Jay becomes so hooked on spin that he's stealing from his mom's purse to pay for it once the Dingo demands it. At that point, Bravestarr's mentor, the Shaman, approaches Jay's young friend and tells him that some secrets are not worth keeping. The boy tells Bravestarr everything, then they go to the kids' clubhouse and find Jay dead from and overdose! The Dingo is arrested, and Bravestarr, thanks the boy who sobs that he wish he'd done it sooner. Up in the mountains, the Shaman sheds a tear for the boy lost to drug abuse.

Wow, what a way to end. There are plenty more where those came from, but those are the four that stood out for me. Today's kidvid and today's war on drugs are way different than the 80s and 90s, but to me it looks like the battle against opioid addiction is being treated like in the old days, when marijuana was illegal everywhere. Where will it go from here? And will it be effective? Who knows...

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About the Creator

D.K. Upshaw

I call myself the baby boomer with the heart of a millennial. As an animator/cartoonist/ caricaturist, I'm inspired by the SatAM cartoons of the 60s, 70s and 80s--a wonderful time to watch TV!

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