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Questioning the Maturity of the MCU Fans

'Avengers: Endgame'

By SkylerPublished 5 years ago 4 min read
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We are upon the release of the MCU's Avengers: Endgame and the fandom for it is huge! Fans are speculating many theories, spoilers have leaked and they are trying their best to hide from them. Why wouldn't they be? This is what the MCU has been building to... right? However, it is two things about the hype for this film that has me... concerned, for lack of a better word.

The Ant-Man Theory

Do you know of the Ant-Man theory? It takes really no reading into to get that much depth of it. You may hover over it on Twitter, or simply plug it into Google with plenty of results and memes. The overall gist is that Thanos is defeated by Ant-Man shrinking down to microscopic size and then sneaking up Thanos' rectum to then grow in size. Another theory goes that Ant-Man, or Giant-Man in this sense, grows to the point that he can shove Thanos up his own rectum.

Believe it or not, many fans love this idea and find it hilarious. Why? We end this twenty plus movie arc with basically a butt-joke? Can you not catch that on something like South Park? Thanos has been built up to this giant, pen-ultimate villain that some fans even empathize with. He has the power of a god but you want him defeated with writing from Beavis and Butt-Head? Luckily, the directors have dismissed this as ridiculous. Simultaneously, I do not completely believe them. That is not say they are for sure going to do this. Follow me, but we are dealing with a universe full of pathos, endless banter, and jokes. They sacrifice almost any drama for a gag. Happy Hogan begins to pour his heart out in Spider-Man: Homecoming until we hear the toilet flush! Get it? Because you know... toilets are funny and stuff. Let the Avengers discuss ice cream flavors instead of Thanos. We defeat the villain by distracting him with... a dance-off? How did Fury lose his eye? A cat scratch! Are you seeing a trend here?

Perhaps I should not blame the fans for this. The MCU has kind of created this humor, I would not put this ludicrous theory past the writer, directors and producers within the MCU. They say they are for world building, characters but really they are for just cheap entertainment. Sadly, this has created fans who cannot appreciate any real art and drama in anything. Now, we have fans clamoring for Superman to just show up at birthday parties rather than be in any actual conflict. Fans do not care for the characters so much as they care more for the costumes, the powers and just the sheer entertainment.

The Run-Time

For quite some time it has been known that Avengers: Endgame will have a run-time of 181 minutes, or over three hours. This includes opening and closing credits. Do not forget most will stay for the closing credits in hopes of something afterwards. Put previews on top of this which can be close to ten minutes sometimes. Again, hover over Twitter or Google it, already fans are talking about not leaving their seats for the bathroom, they cannot bare the idea. In fact, some are claiming they are practicing it already at home with binge watching.

Newsflash! Holding in your urine is not healthy. Holding for seconds or a minute or two is one thing, but prolonged periods, such as hour or more—not advised. Again fans, use Google, it is your friend. Holding your urine can possibly lead to a urinary tract infection or bladder infection. If you have to spend some time in the bathroom so be it! You can ask a friend what happened when you get back. You can always wait for home release and view it at your own pleasure. Plus, don't most fans engage in repeat viewings in theaters? Nothing in this movie can be more important than your own health.

I want to chalk this up to toxic masculinity. Again, people are already comparing notes on-line in how long they can hold it. This is not that far off from comparing dick-sizes. I want throw in rabid fandom as well. I truly think they feel that if they cannot sit through the entire film then they are not hardcore MCU fans. Sitting this one through is like a test of faith and passion. By sitting here for three plus hours with no bathroom breaks shows that I am a devout MCU fan. You can get up when nature calls during a lecture at work or school, maybe a panel at a con for the Russos themselves. Will they notice you got up and came back? Maybe. Will they care? Not really. Will the movie notice you got up and left? Nope, and trust me, the movie has no feelings to care if you got up and left. Hence, your passion makes you look like a lunatic.

I feel as if the MCU has helped to produce a generation of little man-children. Hence, I will be happy when this film is said and done.

entertainment
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About the Creator

Skyler

Full-time worker, history student and an avid comic book nerd.

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