Transformers Movie Review
It’s time to review where it started, Transformers numero uno. In fact some say this is the best of the movie saga. The movie has great pacing and great story. However there isn’t a lot of action (for a Transformers film) and that’s to be expected.
Our saga begins with Optimus talking about, “The Cube” aka the AllSpark. The AllSpark creates life or Energon (as explained in TF2). Optimus says he tracked it to Earth but that he was too late. The next scene is really good. In retrospect you have to remember that we humans don’t know anything about Transformers (so you think-major continuity errors in later movies). So when Blackout takes out an American Middle Eastern base its like oh sh**! I love the special effects, which in 2007 were groundbreaking.
Then we meet Sam Witwicky, the main human character in the first 3 movies. Sam buys a car which turns out to be Bumble Bee. I really like Shia LaBeouf’s acting. He is really goofy. He does the “No No No” thing here. Makayla’s character is ok I guess. She’s played by the super hot Megan Fox. I feel the two have more chemistry in the 2nd film. However, they are good here.
Basically, Sam’s glasses which were his grandad's are the key to finding the location of the Allspark. The Autobots must find them first before the Decepticons. Plothole…the humans found it first….and Megatron. In the scene where you are introduced to Optimus and the Autobot crew, you basically get told the story of the transformers really quickly. I love how Ratchet says this about Sam, “The boys' hormone levels indicate he wishes to mate with the female”. Its like bruh, don’t reveal that! And bruh this is supposedly a kids movie hahaha.
The next scenes are perfectly paced. Notice I left a lot of plot out. I’m not going over everything this time. I felt the scene where Sector 7 (never heard of it? Never will….) come to get Sam is really good. Optimus rescues Sam and Makayla…if only momentarily. Eventually we end up at the Hoover Dam where a frozen Megatron is. The decepticons manage to follow Sam there. Megatron is unfrozen by this cool, small decepticon who kills people in an earlier scene on Air Force One. How they defeat that lil f***er is so funny too. He basically kills himself with his projectiles. I also didn’t mention Anthony Anderson’s character plays a minor role here. He is basically comic relief. The female analyst that gets him involved in the plot is good too.
Basically, Bumble gets the Cube and the characters decide to take it into Los Angeles. (We don’t know that’s the city until TF2). What ensues is the first official battle of the war. Optimus is again late to the party because he was busy killing Decepticon Bonecrusher. It’s a good fight but really short. Megatron shows up and kills the “gangsta” autobot Jazz. What I noticed here is Megatron is nearly unbeatable in this film. Which if you’ve read my other reviews, you know that Megatron gets his a** wupped in every other film…consistently. Optimus cannot beat Megatron for some weird reason….it's a plot thingy I guess. He’s a fuccn Prime for god sake! Long story short Megatron is killed by Sam who puts the (miniature) All Spark Cube in his chest. It was kind of funny because Optimus told Sam to put it in his chest as a last ditch effort. Sam ignored Optimus and killed Megatron instead. Smart dude.
The movie ends with all the decepticons dead except Star Scream, who for some reason after this movie has an annoying voice, but it's fine in this movie. We’re shown that Sam and Makayla become a couple. The Autobots stay. Optimus gives his (now signature) end of movie speech saying I call Earth home, come find us other autobots…etc. It’s a nice ending. After the credits we see Sam’s parents and they show StarScream fly into space hinting at an inevitable sequel.
Well this movie has the best and most coherent story of all the movies to date. There’s not a lot of action compared to the others but it's fine. I do not think Michael Bay thought this movie would be this successful. In my other reviews (TF4 and TF5) I’ll get into the huge plot holes they create. But this one by itself is really really good. Okay I’ve rambled on, let’s put a score on it….