Twisted Minds

Titania = Tatiana

Oberon = Oliver

Lysander = Alexander

Demetrius = Dimitri

Hermia = Hermione

Helena = Helen

Egeus = Edward

Theseus = Thomas (Tom)

Hippolyta = Heliodora

Quince = Quincy

Bottom = Steve

Snug = Barry

Starveling = Dwight

Flute = Ayre

Snout = Nosey

Philostrate = Philip (Phil)

Robin Goodfellow = Rob

Peaseblossom = Marigold

Cobweb = Arachne

Mote = Francesca

Mustardseed = Rosemary

A fairy = a posse member

Tom and Heliodora finally made it to the United States from Greece. It had been a whirlwind flight, and all they wanted to do was relax at Tom's house with their friends.

They started out listening to Heliodora's more Greek sound and thinking of how to integrate it with an American one. As their friends were still discussing it, Tom took Heliodora aside and talked with her about their personal plans.

"I'm looking forward to marrying you," Tom said.

Heliodora gave him a warm, understanding smile. He just had to hug her for it.

Edward, Tom's former manager, and long-time friend, came in and broke the happy silence between them. As he guy-hugged Edward "hello," Tom noticed he'd brought his daughter, her friend and the two men who wanted to marry the daughter. She only wanted to marry one of them. Edward wanted her to marry the other one.

Tom gave Edward a quizzical look.

"Well, you know how much Hermione looks up to you. I was hoping you could convince her that Dimitri is the clear choice to marry." Edward said.

Tom noticed Alexander's fingers twitching and his face tightening as Edward said the last part. Right after, Hermione hurried over to Alexander's side and leaned on him to comfort him. Edward took this as an act of defiance and glared angrily at the both of them. Dimitri just looked affectedly offended. It was such a spectacle that Tom was torn between the urge to laugh and wanting to stay out of the whole thing.

Tom walked Edward and Dimitri into his kitchen.

When they were alone, Alexander and Hermione could speak more freely.

"Let's elope," Alexander said with a plea in his eyes.

"But how do we get away?" Hermione asked.

"You remember where you and Helen met me a month ago? Right outside Oliver and Tatiana's front door?"

"Yes!"

"Meet me there tomorrow night. We'll continue to my aunt's from there."

Hermione smiled warmly at Alexander with hope in her eyes.

Helen came in since she was tired of chatting with the limo driver about nothing.

"Helen!" Hermione exclaimed. "We're eloping!"

"How?" Helen asked.

"We're meeting in front of Oliver and Tatiana's tomorrow night," Hermione responded.

"I know your dad used to be his manager and we used to hang out there, but I didn't think it'd be the site of such a change in your life. I'll miss you!" Helen said, hugging Hermione.

"Oh, you'll be able to visit. We're going to live at Alexander's aunt's house." Hermione assured her.

As Edward, Dimitri, Alexander, and Hermione went out to the limo, Helen took a moment for herself.

"I'll tell Dimitri, even if it does nothing for me," Helen muttered as she walked out.

At a broken-down theater, six roommates were meeting to plan the play they'd be performing for Tom. He'd been the only celebrity who'd responded to their tweets enough to organize a date and time for them to showcase their talents to him. They really just wanted to break into acting and thought that if a big celebrity were backing them they'd make it farther.

Quincy, the one who always designated himself leader, was handing out the parts and the lines. The performance was the night after the next. They'd taken so little time in preparing because the rest of their time had been spent earning the money to afford rent, bills, and groceries. They were just lucky it was split between the six of them.

"I see everyone's here," Quincy said.

"Steve, you're playing Pyramus." he said, handing Steve his script.

"Ayre, you're playing Thisbe." Quincy said, offering Ayre his script.

Ayre refused at first.

"Don't make me play a woman! I'm growing a beard!" Ayre whined.

"You'll wear a mask," Quincy argued.

"Fine!" Ayre said, begrudgingly accepting his script.

"Dwight, you're playing Thisbe's mother." Quincy continued.

"Nosey, you're playing Pyramus' father," he said.

"Barry, you're playing the lion, so you don't need a script. You just have to roar." Quincy said as he put all his papers away.

"One final thing before you all go," Quincy added, "You don't have to worry about censorship with this performance, so just stick to it as is."

Over at Oliver and Tatiana's house, one of Tatiana's friends happened to bump into Rob, one of Oliver's friends.

"Are they seriously still fighting over that new kid?" Tatiana's friend asked.

Rob sadly nodded his head, hiding his mirth at the situation.

Oliver came in, followed by the rest of his posse just as Tatiana came in with hers.

"Hey, friend-Nazi," Oliver quipped.

"So jealous?" Tatiana asked, swaying her hips away from him and waving her posse aside.

"You could stay, considering I'm your husband." Oliver sardonically remarked.

"That must make me your wife. But I remember when you disguised yourself and used a bunch of lines on Phyllis. The only reason you're up right now is 'cause you want to give your favorite musician and his fiancee your best on their wedding night." Tatiana snarked at him, looking at him with venom in her eyes.

"Quit implying I want her for myself when you're no better. You screwed up all his past relationships, hoping to keep him on the side for yourself." Oliver seethed, narrowing his eyes at her.

"Paranoid jealousy is what this is. I never met up with him. But you sure made a mess when you fought him anyway. Quit holding grudges when the rest of the world lets things go." Tatiana said, screwing up her nose at him with her hands on her hips.

"Practice what you preach. You're just as guilty. Just stop pissing me off. I just want the new kid to be in my group of friends." Oliver sighed.

"Put your mind at ease. I'm not giving the new kid up. His mom was my friend even before I got famous. She died giving birth to him. That's why I'm keeping him with my friends, in honor of her." Tatiana breathed.

"How long are you going to be here?" Oliver asked.

"Probably until after Tom's wedding. If you'll be civil, you can go with us. If not, we'll just stay away from each other." Tatiana said, the fatigue of conflict evident on her face.

"I can be civil if the new kid joins my friends." Oliver recommenced.

"Not for all the properties you own. Let's go. There'll be a real fight if I stay here."

There was an angry switch in Tatiana's hips as she walked out.

"Well, go then! You're not leaving until I get back at you!" Oliver yelled after her. "Rob, come here. Remember when I saw that woman sing? Her singing was so moving, it made everybody cry."

"Yeah," Rob said.

"I want you to do that, but the opposite," Oliver said, looking like an enthusiastic and crazed mad scientist.

"What do you mean?" Rob asked.

"I want you to mess with Tatiana's head so much that she falls in love with the next ugly man that she sees. Then she'll have to give me the new kid as my friend. After that, she can go back to normal."

Oliver hid in a hall closet when he heard two sets of footsteps approaching. Rob headed into the kitchen to grab a snack.

"I don't love you, so stop following me!" Dimitri yelled at Helen. "Where's Alexander and Hermione? You told me they'd be here. Now I'm stuck here, and don't want to be stuck here with you, so stop following me!"

"I like you!" Helen yelled.

"You act like I'm trying to make you like me. In all honesty, I've been telling you that I can't like you."

"I still like you."

Once they left, Oliver came back out. He shook his head at what he'd just overheard, feeling sorry for Helen. A look of enthusiasm came onto his face as he noticed Rob returning from his snack.

"I've got more fun for you," Oliver said, a gleam in his eyes.

"What is it now?" Rob asked.

"I need you to do your mind game thing on others."

"Who?"

"Those two lovers who were just here."

"Well, I know of the love quadrangle between Alexander, Hermione, Dimitri, and Helen."

"Yes. Two of them."

Oliver left before Rob could ask him which two.

Rob went up to his guest room.

Tatiana and her friends came in and they turned on the radio. The soothing music lulled Tatiana to sleep. All her friends left except one. She went up to her own guest room.

Rob came down and whispered things in Tatiana's ear as she slept, then went back upstairs.

Alexander and Hermione came in. They were sleepy. They went into Oliver's billiard room and fell asleep on the carpeted floor after Alexander closed the door.

Rob wondered what the noise was and came down to investigate. He saw them sleeping under the pool table and knelt down to whisper things in Alexander's ear. He then went back out and upstairs, leaving the door closed behind him.

Alexander then woke up and went off to find Helen.

The six roommates decided to rehearse together in Oliver and Tatiana's hallway, where Tatiana was sleeping in the front living area.

Just as Steve was bending over her to check if she was awake, Tatiana broke his nose as she woke up. While she was busy swooning over him, his roommates got him tissues for his bleeding nose that they laughingly called "busted" and "ugly." He did look different.

Seeing as Tatiana was laying Steve on the sofa and nursing him back to health, his roommates went home to rehearse. They just didn't want to watch the rest of the bleeding.

Once Tatiana's friends came back, she introduced Steve to Marigold, Arachne, Francesca, and Rosemary. They brought him snacks and beverages.

Oliver overheard all this from the gaming/TV room. He was delighted at Rob's work. It paid to have a former hypnotist and still mentalist as a friend.

He wondered how that friend had done with the lovers. He thought on this as he quietly entered his billiard room and saw Hermione sitting alone on his couch, sad and confused.

Helen and Dimitri eventually circled back around the property and entered the back door. Oliver hid himself behind the door to the billiard room. Tatiana and her friends and Steve had all gone up for her room she kept for when she argued with Oliver.

Dimitri took the living area sofa and Helen lay on the carpet in front of the fireplace.

Rob then quickly scampered down and whispered in Dimitri's ear after Oliver texted him he'd mind-tricked the wrong lover. He looked around for Oliver, then went back upstairs.

As soon as Dimitri woke up and looked at Helen, he was in love.

She woke up to his spooning her and jumped up, jarring him back awake.

"What do you think you're doing?" Helen demanded.

"I was cuddling you," Dimitri responded.

"You made it perfectly clear to me that it was Hermione you wanted, not me."

"Hermione? Why would I want her?" Dimitri asked, looking disgusted.

"Okay, I don't know what you're playing at, but you better straighten this out." Helen said, visibly shaken and angry.

Alexander then came in through the front door and instantly stared at Helen with adoration and loving awe in his eyes.

"Not you too?!" Helen exclaimed.

Dimitri glared at Alexander. Alexander shifted his gaze and glared right back at him.

Disturbed out of her tears, Hermione came out of the billiard room. She looked bewildered.

"What is going on?" Hermione asked.

"You tell me," Helen said, giving Hermione an arch look. "First, these men trip over themselves to have you, and all of a sudden they act interested in me. This is after they both talked to you."

"You think I put them up to this?" Hermione asked.

Helen nodded, still giving her that arch look.

"I'm just as confused as you are." Hermione protested.

"Huh," Helen scoffed.

"Okay, I can't even think anymore. I'm too sleepy. I'm going back in there." Hermione said distractedly.

She curled up under the pool table and fell asleep.

Alexander remembered the pool table and fell asleep next to it.

Dimitri slept on Oliver's couch and Helen on the floor next to it.

Oliver texted Rob to come down and finish undoing his mistake.

In a few minutes, Rob was in the billiard room, whispering in Alexander's ear for the last time. He and Oliver then went upstairs to let things progress.

When he woke up, Alexander looked on his beloved. He went to sleep under the pool table.

When Dimitri woke up, he snuck down on the carpet next to Helen.

Edward came over the next morning and called Tom and Heliodora to come over.

When the lovers woke up, it was clear by their body language who they'd chosen to be with.

"Well, it looks like it sorted itself out," Tom commented to Edward.

They all got married later that day. Tom and Heliodora were up first, then Alexander and Hermione, then Dimitri and Helen.

Tatiana finally consented that a male influence would be good for the new kid and allowed him to become one of Oliver's friends. Once that was done, Oliver got Rob to whisper in Tatiana's ear one last time in her sleep.

By that time, they'd gotten a medic in to put Steve's nose back in line so he'd look like his old self. It was just in time for the performance too.

Quincy, Barry, Dwight, Ayre, and Nosey came back to get Steve over to the theater in which they'd first rehearsed. Everyone else wasn't far behind.

As they were seating themselves, Tom asked Phil, his P.R. guy, what the play was about.

"Pyramus and Thisbe. I think it focuses on his death. Don't ask me why they picked something so depressing." Phil said confidentially.

"If we offend, it is with our goodwill. To show our simple skill, that is the purpose of this performance. Here are the actors, who'll show you all you need to know." said Quincy as the narrator.

"He really doesn't stick to details," Tom commented.

Alexander and Heliodora laughed in assent.

"I'm the wall," said Nosey as the wall through which Pyramus and Thisbe spoke.

"Would you rather hear better from a wall?" Tom joked.

"It's the wittiest wall I've ever heard." Dimitri joked back.

"I'm so glad for this wall, but I can't see Thisbe," said Steve as Pyramus.

"I can't stand this wall for standing between Pyramus and me," said Ayre as Thisbe.

"I hear someone! Thisbe?"

"My love!"

"It's me."

"Kiss me through the hole in the wall."

"I can't reach your lips."

"Meet me at Ninny's tomb."

"I will."

"Finally, the wall's down." Tom joked.

"Considering it was spying on them." Dimitri joked back.

Heliodora simply laughed. They all had copies of the play in their hands.

"Roar!" yelled Barry as the lion.

"I am moonlight," said Dwight as the moonlight.

"This is old Ninny's tomb. Where's Pyramus?" said Ayre.

"Roar!" yelled Barry.

Ayre ran offstage and Barry "mauled" the mantle, then exited when Steve entered.

"I'm so glad the moon is out. But what do I see?! Thisbe is dead! And so I die too." said Steve, "stabbing" himself and "dying."

Dwight exited, then Ayre entered.

"Pyramus, are you asleep? You're dead? All I used to enjoy of you is gone! Since he is dead, let me die too." said Ayre, "stabbing" himself and "dying."

"They left the moonlight and lion to bury them." Tom joked.

"Don't forget the wall." Dimitri joked back.

Steve and Ayre got up.

"Nope, the wall's down that kept their lands apart. Would you like the epilogue or a dance?" Steve asked.

"No. Nothing further for tonight." Tom said, waving the rest of the actors back on stage. "In fact, I have to tell you something. I can't pass this performance of this play on to anyone. It doesn't show your skills properly as actors. You need more work."

He gave them a look that signified an end to his being their acting mentor.

They left, disheartened, but at least with the respect of the truth.

Everyone else went home to sleep.