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W.T.F. Japan? The Most Bizarre Anime Ever

There’s anime that’s dramatic, funny or ultimately terrifying, but this shit takes the cake.

Because there are so many genres in anime, every story is different. Many are original, some are confusing, but mainly they’re always entertaining. Then you get the shows that make you feel like you’re tripping your balls off or just very, very high… seriously. You can’t tell what the hell’s going on, the colors, the lights, the weird characters, the bizarre plot… These are the shows that make you think, “What the f*%# is this shit?”. You don't know whether to run like hell or keep watching to see if it eventually makes sense.

The following are some of the most bizarre, weird, what the f*%# anime I’ve ever heard of. I think they pretty much speak for themselves.

Akikan!

Vending machines are everywhere in Japan and they sell everything from the usual soda and snacks, to panties, energy drinks and condoms (ahem... all in the same machine, mind you). They do not, however, have any that will sell you a girlfriend, at least not yet. Yup… wait for it!

This anime is about soda cans that turn into girls. These soda can girls, which are either steel cans or aluminum cans, battle royale with each other to determine whether steel or aluminum is superior. Oh yeah, did I mention that they also need to be regularly infused with carbon dioxide? I’ll let you guess where the CO2 comes from. I wonder if they were sponsored by any big name beverage companies? Let’s hope not.

Midori Days

Conjoined twins aren’t all that uncommon these days. South Park, Family Guy - many shows have poked fun at this weird phenomenon. Anime, however, takes it a little further. Uncomfortably further…

Midori Days features Seiji, a high-school thug who is lonely and unlucky in love. No girl wants him because of his bad rep. One day, alone at home, he bemoans the fact that he’s destined to live his life with only his right hand as his lover, and swears to accept any girl who will have him. Soon after, he discovers that his right hand has actually turned into a mini teenage girl named Midori. He really should have picked a better choice of words…

Believe it or not, even though it’s pretty bizarre, it’s not a bad show. It’s mostly slapstick humor with some serious elements and, surprisingly, it’s free of the dirty humor you’d expect. Still pretty weird though…

Samauri Pizza Cats

They're cats, they're samurai, they work at a pizza joint… um… this pretty much sums it up.

Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-Chan

The series centers around a boy named Sakura Kusakabe, a Junior High student that was marked for death by God due to the fact that he will invent a form of immortality in the future that stops women from growing any older than 12 years of age creating "a pedophile's world". God sends Dokuro, an angel assassin, back in time to kill him with her trusty spiked club, Excalibolg. She does end up killing the pervert, repeatedly… She keeps immediately resurrecting him, just to kill him again. The funny thing is, Sakura doesn’t just get killed, he gets dismembered, bludgeoned and splattered in the most creative and gruesome ways possible, over and over. Sometimes he comes back “not quite put together right”. The show basically revolves around this - blood, boobies, violence, boobies, partial nudity, more blood, more bouncing boobies, gore, blatant groping, more groping, blood, blood, blood. Need I say more?

Cat Soup

This is an award winning short film that’s centered around a family of human-like cats, specifically two kittens. The story is about Nyatta, a young cat boy and his sister Nyaako. Nyaako is very ill and dies, however, Nyatta sees her soul being taken away by Death and is able to retrieve half of it, leaving Nyaako braindead. Nyatta then goes on a psychedelic journey with his sister in order to save her soul. Yes, it’s quite trippy. It’s more like a fairy tale that turns into nightmare reality. There are sound effects, the characters make noise, but there is no actual dialogue at all. They meet some brutal and gruesome characters along the way… oh yeah, and watch out for the cannibalism.

Cat Soup's simplistic character designs may fool people into thinking that it's an innocent, cute, animated short appropriate for children, but...

WARNING: This is not for children. On the damn box, it’s described as “Hello Kitty on acid”.  

If you end up watching this, I suggest you do it free and clear of all drugs - you’re going to feel trippy enough by the time it's over. 

FLCL (Fooly Cooly)

A space traveler on a Vespa repeatedly bashes a kid’s skull in with her vintage Rickenbacker 4001 left-handed electric bass guitar creating an N.O. portal which makes giant robots emerge from his head periodically. Whew... Meanwhile, the town is covered in steam from a giant industrial complex in the shape of an iron, as an agent with seaweed paper for eyebrows tries to prevent a galactic hand from reaching down and using the iron to smooth man’s thoughts. I know… WTF? It’s just hilariously chaotic and never ends up making sense. Should you take a chance in watching it? I really don’t know what to say on this one…

And finally.

Midori: Shoujo Tsubaki

What can I really say about this one? Well, for one - it’s been on many worst anime of all time lists. Two - this anime was actually BANNED in Japan and the Japanese Government prohibited it from being released outside of Japan, (it's all over the web though, of course). The anime was originally made to be shown only at Carnival Freak Shows. The story itself, well, when a 10 year old girl’s mother dies, she is conned into servitude for a traveling freak show, suffering rape, humiliation and abuse. She’s made to marry a “little person”... yes at 10 years old. When her “husband” is supposedly killed by the rest of the Carnival folk, she seriously loses it and ends up killing everyone and anything she comes across, in every way possible. The animation is very weird and grotesque and it’s full of rape, weird eye-ball licking, three-way sex, blood, guts and gore. I’ve read that people have actually gotten physically ill when watching this. This anime was made by one Japanese man, who basically shut himself in a room and spent his whole life-savings creating and animating it. No other studio was willing to sponsor him to make it. Believe it or not, a real-life adaptation was made of this anime not that long ago. Gross and bizarre… I don’t recommend this to anyone unless you want to lose your lunch.

If you do happen to watch any of these bizarre anime, I wish you good luck. And remember kids… this is what happens when you do drugs!

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