Why the F*** Are You Still Watching 'Grey's?'

Grey's Anatomy.. We all know the show—some of us a little too well. Whether you've watched since the beginning, began mid-way through, or have binged watched the series four times (guilty), we've all seen it. Almost 13 years and 14 seasons later, we're all still rushing our partners off the TV, flipping to ABC and giving all our attention to Grey-Sloan Memorial Hospital for the next hour.

But why is that? And before you feel personally victimized, I am including myself in the Greysorexia Group: the overwhelming addiction to watch Grey's Anatomy. I'm actually the leader of the Greysorexics.

Just to show you how pathetic I am, my best friend moved to Florida, so every Thursday we get in front of our respective TV's, cellphone in hand, and live text the episode's ups and downs.

Am I ashamed? Are any of us ashamed? Hell no, but we are all collectively confused on why the f*** we're all still obsessively watching Grey's.

DISCLOSURE: I'M ABOUT TO UNLOAD SOME TRAGIC GREY'S EVENTS AND IF YOU'RE JUST BEGINNING THE BINGE, SKIP TO A PART YOU KNOW.

1. George O'Malley's Heroic Act

The first traumatic event—Our beloved Bambi, George, jumps in front of a bus and dies. George was built up as one of Grey's sweetest characters, then BAM, he's taken away from us. You'd think this would have been enough for us to at least take a little break to gather our thoughts and feelings before jumping back into the fire known as Grey's Anatomy, but it wasn't.

The Mark Sloan & Lexie Grey Love Story

One of the best love stories to follow. Did we want them together? Did we not want them together? Did we want Mark all for ourselves? YES. The plane crash episode is up there as one of my absolute favorite Grey's episodes and one of the saddest. Mark and Lexie realize their perfect for each other just too late as Lexie takes her last breath in Mark's hands. Mark, utterly heartbroken, dies weeks later in the hospital while on life support from the heartache (or from internal injuries but that's not as romantic). But did we turn our backs to Grey's? No, we kept coming back for the mental torture and abuse.

Cristina Yang's Last Day

Meredith's person and our favorite sarcastic, intelligent, dancing surgeon. So naturally she had to exit the show because why would Shonda want to keep her viewers happy?! And not only is she gone, we are all being tortured with rumors for the past two seasons that she may return. Has she? NO. Am I salty? YES. The show really is not the same without Cristina's character and neither is Meredith. Don't get me wrong, I love Alex, but he is no replacement and no Cristina.

The Post-It Marriage

Meredith and Derek.. We've been Team McDreamy since day one. Seriously, you've never heard a single person on this planet EVER say, "Ehh, Derek was alright." When Cristina told Meredith, "He is very dreamy, but he is not the sun. You are," it was totally adorable and totally WRONG.

DEREK SHEPHERD IS THE SUN.

Grey's has trudged on for three seasons since Derek was in a car accident after saving lives and fell victim to medical negligence (WHO THE FUCK DOESN'T KNOW TO GIVE A HEAD CT). And I do mean trudged—No one can accept Meredith with any other man, Amelia is not cool, and the balance of the show is just off.

So you're thinking this is definitely when we all stopped watching Grey's. Wrong. We're all still here.

Everyone always leaves me.

Adding onto the terrible trauma I've already stated, characters exiting the show is very normal. Izzy somehow beat fatal cancer (BUT DEREK CAN'T GET A CT) and left like nothing happened, Burke left, Addison left right when we began to accept her, Teddy left but came back for a short cameo in season 14, my beloved Callie "moved" away, and now Arizona and April are leaving after this season too. The only originals left are Meredith, Alex, Bailey, and Webber. Yet we all still hold on to our famous Grey's and keep opening up our heart to the abuse.

So you're asking, "Why the f*** are you still watching Grey's?" BECAUSE.

That's honestly the best answer. Most Greysorexics are between 18 and 26, so we began watching years after the first season. We've spent the most important, influential years of our lives practically walking the halls of Grey-Sloan. We've invested too much time and too many years...it's a part of our lives, so we can't just stop watching. No matter how hurtful, how sad, or how much Shonda tortures us mentally/emotionally/spiritually, we cannot divorce Grey's. Yes, we all still tune in every Thursday but we do so with a heavy heart. The drama and intensity is lacking, and so is our interest. But we can't just stop watching. When Meredith decides to stop lining her pockets with more seasons, then we'll stop. That may be season 15 or season 35—who knows. All we do know is we will still be planning our Thursdays around 8 PM to watch Grey's, and we are not ashamed.