Harry Potter Is an Ungrateful Jerk

Poor Harry Potter, he's had such a hard life. Sad face. Weepy face. Tissues.

I don't mean to sound like a cruel monster or anything but I'm getting kind of tired of everyone feeling sorry for Harry. Yes, he has had a rather bizarre start to his life, he's been put in dangers more grave than most of us have ever faced, and he's always being pursued by the same xenophobic maniac that murdered both his parents but is everyone blind to the fact that, despite all the adversity, he could've been much worse off?

It's popular to rag on the Dursley family and shame them for the way they treated Harry. Let's not pay any attention to all the things they did right! They gave him a roof under which to stay warm, they provided clothes, food, and a cozy place to sleep at night, and they even sent him to school! So what if they made him work a little to earn his keep? We all make our children do chores. Yes, Dudley did make his life unpleasant at times but who can honestly say they don't have a sibling that treated them this way? The cupboard under the stairs? You have no idea how many times I wished I could have a sweet place to stay like underneath freakin' stairs! That's awesome! And I bet it gets really dark in there; perfect sleeping conditions. It seems so cozy! Just enough room for him and his most prized possessions.

Some will argue that the Dursley's withholding information about Harry's magical lineage was a morally ambiguous act that attests to their cruel nature but I say, though it may have seemed ill-natured, the Dursley family was, in fact, protecting Harry and, in doing so, fulfilling their obligation to care for and protect the boy until he comes of age. The muggle world is a dangerous place for the magically gifted. You can imagine what our government would do to a freak like Harry, therefore it was only in the interest of safety that the Dursleys chose to hide Harry's true identity. Even from him.

Thinking about all the bullet points I just went over, I think it's safe to say that Harry Potter had it pretty damn good. I mean, there's no indication or evidence that he was being physically abused or neglected so, aside from that, what else is there?

Exactly! There's nothing. So, I conclude with this: Life isn't always as grand or as simple as we hope and fantasize it will be and Harry needs to realize that. Instead of sulking and complaining about how terrible his life is, he needs to think about all the luxuries he's been afforded and how much worse it is for children in third-world countries.

So shut up, Harry Potter.

Just shut up.