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The 10 Characters We Abso'squanching'lutely Need To See In 'Rick And Morty' Season 3!

*Burp* For those who haven't dipped into the mad world of Rick and Morty, seriously, where the 'squanch' have you been since 2013?

By Tom ChapmanPublished 6 years ago 7 min read
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*Burp* For those who haven't dipped into the mad world of Rick and Morty, seriously, where the 'squanch' have you been since 2013? Adult Swim's cartoon-comedy follows Rick the alcoholic scientist and his weedy grandson Morty. The pair travel through time and space, so no surprise that the show started life as a Back to the Future parody. The series may have only aired 21 episodes, but it has got one hell of a following.

What makes Rick and Morty a must-watch is its imaginative settings and cavalcade of insane characters. From inter-dimensional sex robots to whole races with gears (YES, GEARS) for testicles. Here are the crazy characters from the heads of Justin Roiland and Dan Harmon that we just HAVE to see in again Season 3...if we ever get it!

10. Baby Legs and Regular Legs

Both seasons of Rick and Morty have featured an improvised episode consisting of alien TV shows - with hilarious results. From 'Ants in my Eyes Johnson', to 'Stealy', the cable television episodes have been two of the show's strongest so far. Forming Rick and Morty's very own Wheels and the Legman from American Dad!, Baby Legs and Regular Legs was one reality TV show that actually had a feasible premise. Meet Baby Legs, the great cop with a rather 'small' handicap. Paired up with Regular Legs, the two take on crime before nap-time. We say give the stumpy police cop some more room to run around and his own episode!

9. Bird Person

Imagine if Bird Person had been voiced by Michael Keaton - he certainly channels that early Bruce Wayne gruffness? We may not see him popping up in Spider-Man: Homecoming, but Bird Person is the dull and bland hero you could always rely on. With his brooding Batman persona, this stereotypical hero rip-off is one of Rick Sanchez's few remaining friends. The wedding of Bird Person and Summer's friend Tammy made up the main storyline for the Season 2 finale "The Wedding Squanchers". Shot down in a flurry of feathers, it looks like Bird Person was well and truly roasted! It may seem unlikely that we'll see our avian hero again, but he obviously has a place in Dan Harmon's heart. Harmon famously dressed as Bird Person for Comic-Con 2015, so I think he will fly again.

8. Ice-T

Only in Rick and Morty could all of the world's musical talent be killed off, leaving Ice-T as our only hope to save the planet from a giant Simon Cowell head. Sadly, Rick and Morty's Ice-T is voiced by co-creator Dan Harmon, but it is a solid impression. Revealed as an alien from the planet Alphabetrium, Ice-T was actually known as Water-T before being banished by his father, Magma-Q. Returning to save the day, when we left Ice-T he was battling the evil Numbericons. There was a childhood series of books called Letterland about anthropomorphic letter people, so if anyone remembers that, you will see where I am going with this. We need to see if Ice-T managed to "crunch the numbers" in Season 3.

7. Scary Terry

Somewhere Robert Englund is throwing a razor glove at the screen. Being a bit of a horror buff, any show that manages to parody A Nightmare on Elm Street is alright by me. Scary Terry is described as a:

Legally-safe knockoff of an '80s horror character with miniature swords for fingers instead of knives.

As Rick and Morty delved deeper into the Inception-style dreamworld in "Lawnmower Dog", they realised that even monsters have nightmares too. With his catchphrase of using the word 'BITCH', Scary Terry dropped more B-Bombs than Jesse Pinkman. In his comic story appearance, Morty and Rick in: Mortballs, it was revealed that Scary Terry's fedora is the source of his evil; by wearing it Morty could become Scary Morty. In classic Rick and Morty style, Scary Terry is your typical misunderstood monster, who is actually a self-conscious worrier who is helped by Morty and his grandpa. If he is set to return, we want to see him flex those swords!

6. Dr. Xenon Bloom

Yes, I know he perished during the first seasons episode "Anatomy Park", but Rick and Morty's take on Jurassic Park was one of their best outings. Limping around with his cane with a voice that sounds suspiciously like Dr. House, Bloom was the theme park's John Hammond, and we know we all need one of those! The chance to revisit 'Pirates of the Pancreas' one more time is just too tempting to pass up on. Technically although Bloom is dead, Rick was still toying with the idea of a second Anatomy Park. Being an amoeba, I'm sure the showrunners can find a way to bring back Dr. Bloom.

5. Doofus Rick

The father-in-law that Jerry always deserved, Doofus rick was the Dumb and Dumber Harry Dunne - complete with Jim Carey haircut. As 'our' Rick Sanchez was hunted by the council of Ricks, Doofus Rick from dimension J-19 Zeta 7 made up one of the many alternative Ricks. Despite rumours of eating his own faeces, Doofus Rick stole our (and Jerry's) hearts as the caring scientist bullied by the other Ricks. In a rare moment of emotion for the show (above), Jerry and Doofus Rick share a final farewell. It appears that some Rick, somewhere, isn't a complete ass-hat.

4. Mr Poopybutthole

Looking like a human Twinkie in a top hat, Mr. Poopybutthole was the shining star of Season 2's "Total Rickall". Sure, we met Pencilvestyr and Photography Raptor, but Mr. Poopybutthole has to be that episode's strangest invention. Morty's mother, Beth, shot him after thinking he was a dimensional parasite. Unlike most of the Rick and Morty side characters, Mr. Poopybutthole actually survived the events of his episodes. Visiting him in hospital, it looks like Beth's shot at our favourite cameo had taken a toll on the Smith's relationship with Mr. Poopybutthole:

If you love him, you should leave.

In the post-credit scene of the S2 finale we see Mr. Poopybutthole again, walking with the aid of a cane. He told viewers to tune in next season to find out where the Smith family go next. We can't wait to get some answers to where he came from, how long has he known the Smiths and what even is he? All of the above should be answered in Season 3! We tip our top hats to you sir!

3. Evil Morty

Justin Roiland provides many of the show's voices, but never really gets to show us his chops as Rick's grandson/sidekick. Sure, the show is called Rick and Morty, but we know who is Batman and who is Robin. Just as there are many alternative Ricks, there are just as many Mortys. The wicked twist at the end of "Close Rick-counters of the Rick Kind" reveals that an evil Morty was controlling a Robo-Rick. Evil Morty's fate is unknown, as he disappeared into the pack of Rick-less Mortys. Could evil Morty make a comeback? We hope so!

2. Abradolf Lincler

Abradolf Lincler offers a history lesson and a mad science experiment in one. Rarely since Inglorious Basterds have we seen someone tackle Hitler in such an *erm* unique way. Abradolf Lincler was Rick's attempt at creating a morally neutral super leader. He made a brief (but memorable) appearance - Lincler was the uninvited guest at Rick and Summer's house party. He only made it through one episode before apparently being killed off to save the group. We all know Hitler survived several attempts on his life, and the end of "Ricksy Business" sees Lincler being passed around as a sex toy by giant testicle monsters - swearing "Revenge", and surely another appearance.

1. Squanchy

Finally, the Thundercat himself - Squanchy is Top Cat's screwed up distant relative, with a penchant for auto-erotic asphyxiation (called squanching). With his own language, Squanchy is the quotable, lovable alley cat who is crying out for his own line of action figures. When you find a character more messed up than Rick Sanchez, then run with it - that is exactly what Roiland and Harmon did!

Who wants a taste of my squanch?

The Season 2 finale saw Squanchy drink a liquid that he kept in a capped tooth - next we got some sort of Hulk-esque transformation and Squanchy squanched off into the distance to protect the Smith family. We are yet to see if our feral friend survived the events of Bird Person's wedding, but we can live in hope.

Where can the show go next then? Are we returning to Blips and Chitz for a quick round of Roy, or will we explore Rick's burping addiction? Wherever the show goes next, we are sure to meet some pretty weird new faces, and hopefully some of the old ones too. A Jerry/Doofus Rick love story is looming, so bring on the squanch of Season 3!

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About the Creator

Tom Chapman

Tom is a Manchester-based writer with square eyes and the love of a good pun. Raised on a diet of Jurassic Park, this ’90s boy has VHS flowing in his blood. No topic is too big for this freelancer by day, crime-fighting vigilante by night.

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