Out of 10: 'Spider-Man Homecoming'

The MCU’s solo Spider-Man film. Or duet Spider-Man film, depending on your views on Iron Man. I genuinely had no issue with his appearances. I’ve still joked about it twice because my integrity is dead.

Really, it is.

This outing shows Spider-Man’s attempt to bring down alien tech wielding arms dealers. I’ll avoid plot for a more general evaluation.

The genre is the first thing to talk about. It’s a superhero film—wow spoiler, who expected that. It’s also a teen comedy drama, which causes a refreshing divide between this and previous Marvel films. Shame it had to be MCU, it’d definitely be the best Brat Pack film if only they’d made it part of that universe. BPU? No, sounds like a garage. The superhero and teen dramedy scenes operate equally as effectively as each other. There were some seriously emotional moments that were perfectly executed and gave the impact they aimed to. There was also welcome and un-forced levity throughout. Moments like Spider-Man privately practicing how to confront robbers or giving a woman directions add a sense of believability to an otherwise deliberately unbelievable premise.

Every action scene was captivating, fast flowing ,and creative. Spider-Man’s sense of skill & character has never been shown better through his fighting than here. His most implausible power is being a Brit who can maintain an American accent.

Other Marvel actors couldn’t do that, i.e. Benedict Cumberbatch’s Dr Strange… who I won’t name. Oh, damn. The worst bit is I never even noticed Cumberbatch’s shaky accent, I’m just copying someone else’s observations for a cheap laugh- isn’t that the first rule of the internet?

It does seem to be a rule that every time a new Spider-Man, is cast people pretend they always hated the previous ones and were never skeptical about the re-cast even though they vocally were, but this combat point still stands. The stakes felt as high as they could without forcefully capitalising a situation’s danger. Chase scenes were tense and layered with creative flavourings e.g. Spider-Man accidentally interrupting a pool party and being pursued by a dog, that highlight Spidey’s status as an imperfect everyman. An everyman who happens to have super strength, speed, duration, webbing gadgets agility and a Lego death star model. I draw the line at the last one—really challenging plausibility there.

Here's a great image.

Now for performance praise. Holland encapsulated every part of Peter Parker and Spider-Man. Previous films have focused on traits like nervousness or brooding conflictedness at the expense of humour or youth. Oh, by the way did I mention that now a new Spider-Man’s been cast I’ve always hated the previous ones and was never skeptical about the recast even though I vocally was? I haven’t? Good. It’s not true. I actually liked previous actors. Unlike them though, Holland never forgets that Spider-Man is just a teenager, a source of drama and identity that separates him from other heroes. Holland shows all of Peter’s complexity and gives the best overall balance of his traits. Hopefully I won’t say "Holland balanced Peter’s traits too well overall" If they ever cast a new Spidey—god forbid.

Michael Keaton made an incredibly effective villain. Re-inventing Vulture as a troubled and desperate blue collar worker was a smart writing decision that he really adapts to. His origin story was brief and un-indulgent. Throughout, the character feels extremely three dimensional with understandable motives while avoiding over sympathy that’d stop him from being a villain. In one particularly chilling scene, Keaton gives every clue to his feelings just through subdued expressions and minimal lines. It’s rare that actors, or writers, combine extreme threat with extreme humanity. Good god that’s a pretentious line. I can’t blame anyone else for that.

His costume was given an inventive makeover.

Robert Downey Junior was as an effective eccentric mentor and wasn’t overused.

This was a relief since trailers basically made the film look like Iron Man 4, which had already been made under the title Captain America Civil War.

Marissa ToMAY (I am a genius). Get it? Because the last part of her surname is pronounced like May but spelt Mei but her character in the film is called may so both can be combined into the one name, see? Get it? You do. First rule of comedy; explain the joke in excruciating detail or it isn’t funny. Tomei was wisely cast as Aunt May, finally stopping the implausible decision to depict her as a geriatric. Why is May usually so old? Peter’s young and she’s only his aunt—it makes no sense, unlike super powered teenagers, which is just logical. So logical in fact there’ve been 3 film series’ about it. Fun fact; when a new lead for them is cast everyone acts like they hated the previous ones and were never skeptical of the recast.

There are casual appearances from other obscure Marvel characters like 2 versions of Shocker, Betty Brant etc. This is a detail that some Marvel films missed an opportunity to do.

Overall, a firm 9 out of 10. It's close to being perfect and I don't think that's because I'm blinded by a Spider-Man obsession. I am, but I don't think that's actually much of a factor here. Less than is expected, at least.

Small but detracting details like a plot point that even in a world where spider powers exist felt overly contrived and a forced piece of illogical fan service are the only two problems I had. If I was forced to pedantically site a third quibble (which I haven't been but will, anyway) it's that Hannibal Buress would have been interesting as J Jonah Jameson, but Jameson's absence means Buress instead plays the coach. These are easily forgivable though; the first issue lead to some of the film’s most captivating scenes and that the second is only brief. The third was barely even worth mentioning, it's more of a side note/recommendation to try Hannibal Buress' stand up than a criticism since it in no way hindered the film.

By the way, I like Spider-Man.