"Ride it, my pony. My saddle's waiting..." Ginuwine sings in his biggest hit to date, "Pony." There's at least one subsection of the population that is not invited to ride his pony: trans-women, as India Willoughby found out the hard way. They are appearing on Celebrity Big Brother across the pond in England. Ginuwine said he would not date a trans-woman, much to India's ire. She even tried to embrace him; that led to another cast member to crack, "He's just not that into you." This led to an internet conversation (argument?) with some accusing the rapper of being transphobic, and others saying India is an opportunist. Both sets are wrong.
First, we'll start with the easy argument. Maybe India is an opportunist, but in this instance, she seems to be speaking her truth. The embrace could border on sexual harassment, but no accusations have been flung so far, so let's just wait on that. As for her being upset that someone who she might have thought she had a connection with not being interested in her, that's a very human reaction. When my ex and I broke up, I completely scrubbed him from my social media and have taken to denying I even know of his existence. Mariah Carey taught me well. Does that mean that I'm an opportunist too? I'll let you all debate that.
Now let's talk about Ginuwine being transphobic. I have written many articles on this, and I always take flack for it, but preference is preference. Just because he wouldn't date a trans-woman does not mean that he hates transgender women or men. It means that he has no interest in being romantic with them. Shall we call him homophobic because he doesn't want to date men? By all accounts, all the man said is that he is not interested in dating someone who is a trans-woman.
Are we no longer allowed to have preferences? Because that is what this controversy is leading me to think, and if that's the case, I have an issue with Leonardo DiCaprio. I have wanted that man since he was king of the world, and all he dates is Victoria Secret models that are in their 20's. Using the theory of those who say Ginuwine is transphobic, Leo must be sexist, homophobic, ageist, and we'll throw in racist, since I don't think he's dated a woman of color, either. Can you look in the mirror and say that you are open to date anyone that is interested in you? Because I can't.
Sorry ladies, I'm a man's man, and no, I don't mean that I'm masculine. It means that unless you have a penis, I am not interested in dating you. I also want to date someone near my age, because it's easier for us to relate to one another. If someone doesn't want to date me, that's their loss. My feelings might be hurt, and I may get selective amnesia about them, but I don't think that makes them hateful towards a whole group of people. They just have bad taste, and I didn't want them, anyways.
I don't know Ginuwine or India. Maybe the things that are being said about them are true, but from what there is to see on the internet and their views, it seems unlikely. One should be able to express their views about issues, the way these two did, without having to defend themselves to the wolves of the internet. Maybe if we stopped to listen to what was being said, instead of launching into assumptions, the world would be a better place.